Allah nagari ne a kowane lokaci," in ji Hannah Einbinder tana dariya. Ta sauka daga Los Angeles kuma tana zaune ba tare da takalmi ba a kan kujera mai hannu. Wannan, ta bayyana, "lokaci ne mai hauka a rayuwa. Yin tauraro a cikin Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma yayin da Hacks ke ƙarewa… tabbas abin alfahari ne mai yawa."
Hacks ita ce wasan barkwanci na HBO wanda ya ƙare a farkon wannan shekara. A watan Mayu, Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma, wasan ban tsoro na queer na Jane Schoenbrun, ya zama babban abin buguwa a bikin fina-finai na Cannes na wannan shekara.
A cikin fim ɗin, Einbinder tana taka rawa a matsayin Kris, mai shirya fina-finai wadda ta damu da Billy Presley, tauraruwar da ke ɓoye ta ainihin jerin slasher na Camp Miasma—wanda Gillian Anderson ta taka da wayo da sha'awa mai jan hankali. Abin da ya fara a matsayin ƙoƙari na shawo kan Presley ta dawo don wani kashi ya rikiɗe zuwa gauraya mai ban tsoro na jima'i, mutuwa, kaset na VHS, da abinci mara amfani. Yayin da labarin ke buɗewa, layin tsakanin gaskiya da tunani ya fara ɓacewa.
"Lokacin da wakilina ya aiko mini da rubutun, na yi mamaki sosai," in ji Einbinder. "Taken fuskantar kunya, ma'amala da danniya, da rabuwa da kai ya burge ni sosai." (Schoenbrun ta ce wannan jigo ya fito daga tafiyarsu ta kansu na rungumar jima'i bayan canjin jinsi.)
"Ba a ƙarfafa mu mu yi magana game da waɗannan abubuwa ba," in ji Einbinder, "amma abu ne da na sani sosai. Na tambayi kaina: 'Wannan gaskiya ne nawa?' Kamar Kris, dole ne in zurfafa cikin abubuwan da na fuskanta kuma in fuskanci abubuwan da ba na son gani." Fim ɗin, ta ƙara da cewa, ya taimaka mata "ta zama mai buɗe ido game da sha'awa." Har ila yau ya ba ta "jagora na yadda ya kamata ya ji, abin da ya kamata ki zama mai jin daɗi yi ko faɗa, da lokacin da za a ce a'a."
Sanye da doguwar riga baƙar fata mai kai ƙasa da kimon siliki fari mai gudana, Einbinder ta fi kyau fiye da yadda na zata. A kan allo, salon ta da barkwancinta sau da yawa suna karkata zuwa ga ban mamaki; a cikin mutum, tana da ladabi, mai taushin murya, kuma auna auna.
Ƙarfinta na zama tare da rashin jin daɗi yana da gaskiya ga wadda take a matsayin 'yar wasa—wasanninta sau da yawa sun dogara da tashin hankali tsakanin rashin kunya da gaskiyar motsin rai. Schoenbrun ta ce ta jefa ta a cikin Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma saboda sun "ga yadda jikinta ke da ban mamaki."
Abin da ya fi fice shi ne gwanintar Einbinder na ƙirƙirar dangantaka mai ƙarfi tare da tsofaffin abokan wasa mata. A cikin duka Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma da Hacks, tana ciyar da lokaci mai yawa tare da wata mace mai ban sha'awa da ƙarfi.
A cikin jerin da ya daɗe, Einbinder ta taka rawa a matsayin Ava Daniels, marubuciyar barkwanci marar jagora da aka ɗauka don ta farfado da aikin Jean Smart na tauraruwar Las Vegas, Deborah Vance. Ya zama ɗaya daga cikin mafi kyawun wasannin barkwanci na talabijin, amma zuciyar tasirin sa na motsin rai ita ce dangantakar da ke tsakanin Ava da Deborah: mata biyu waɗanda da farko suka yi kama da ba su da wani abu na gama gari, amma a hankali suka zama muhimmi ga juna.
Ƙaunar su ta ginu a kan zagi, cin amana, da gwagwarmayar iko, amma kuma a kan zurfin fahimtar ƙirƙira—Ava tana tura Deborah ta fuskanci abin da ta zama, yayin da Deborah ke koya wa Ava horo da juriya da take rasa.
Yin aiki a kan wasan yana da ma'ana sosai a gare ta, in ji Einbinder, tana hawaye. "Na koyi abubuwa da yawa kuma na zama mutum—na zama kaina. Ban san yadda zan kasance wadda nake ba in ba tare da shi ba."
Ta ɗauki numfashi mai zurfi. "Na fara barkwanci domin hanya ɗaya da zan ji daɗi ita ce idan na ji cewa wasu suna jin daɗi. Lokacin da nake 24 kuma na fara wasan, ni harsashi ne kawai. Ban tsaya wa kaina ba. Ba ni da iyaka. Na kasance mai yin shiru a hanyoyi da yawa."
"Ina tsammanin an haife ni ba tare da girman kai ba. Ko jin tsaka tsaki ya zama abu mai wuya." Don in sami kwanciyar hankali da kaina, balle in ƙaunaci kaina da gaske, ya zama kamar ba zai yiwu ba. Yanzu ina jin ƙarfi sosai da kuma amincewa da wadda nake, ta hanyar da ban taɓa tunanin ba. Ina bin bashin wannan ga lokacin da na yi aiki a kan Hacks.
Yana da wuya a ga kamanceceniya tsakanin tafiyarta da ta halin ta a cikin Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma: mace da aka tura ta fuskanci ɓangarorin kanta waɗanda ta fi so ta yi watsi da su, ta fito da ƙarfi, mafi aminci, kuma mai sadaukarwa ga tsayawa ga kanta da imaninta.
Einbinder ta girma a Los Angeles a cikin iyalin Yahudawa masu ci gaba, inda barkwanci ya kasance "babban kuɗin." Iyayenta—ɗan asalin Saturday Night Live Laraine Newman da ɗan wasa Chad Einbinder—koyaushe suna ƙoƙarin sa juna su yi dariya, kuma ita da ƴan uwanta da sauri suka shiga. "Wannan shi ne ainihin inda aka tsara hanyar da nake sadarwa da wasu."
A kwaleji, yayin da take karatun aikin jarida na watsa labarai, ta shiga ƙungiyar wasan kwaikwayo ta improv kuma ta fara yin standup a daren buɗe mic. Ta kawo wannan horo a ciki, in ji ta, wanda ta ɓullo da shi a matsayin mai gasa a makarantar sakandare. "Na kasance a shirye in yi kasada da komai, har da kunyata kaina, idan yana nufin lokacin gamsuwa da amincewa. Barkwanci ita ce hanyata ta jin daɗi—kuma a gaskiya, yawancin lokaci, ba na jin daɗi."
A shekara ta 2019, tana yawon shakatawa a matsayin mai buɗe wasan ga mai barkwanci Chelsea Handler, kuma a shekara mai zuwa ta fara fitowa a daren maraice a The Late Show With Stephen Colbert—wasan da ya taimaka mata ta sami Hacks, ko da yake ba ta da wani aikin wasan kwaikwayo. "Shi ne kawai abin da nake da shi don nuna kaina," in ji ta.
Gwajin, a watan Maris 2020, ya buƙaci halin ya fashe da kuka. Einbinder na iya jin sauran masu neman aiki suna kuka ta bangon; ba ta taɓa koyon yin kuka bisa umarni ba. "Na yi tunani, ba zan iya yin hawayen ba, amma zan iya jefa wargi." Ya yi aiki; a gaskiya, wargi ya yi nasara sosai har ya ƙare a cikin wasan.
Ɗaya daga cikin manyan labaran Hacks yana bin gwagwarmayar Deborah na shiga talabijin na daren maraice. Wannan shi ne inda Einbinder ta sami babban damarta. Na tambaye ta abin da take tunani game da halin da ake ciki na barkwanci na Amurka.
"Colbert ya tafi," in ji ta, tana nufin ficewar Stephen Colbert daga The Late Show. "CBS ta bayyana manufofinta a fili. [Jimmy] Kimmel an dakatar da shi. Babu shakka waɗannan zaɓe ne na siyasa." Amma abin da ke tsoratarwa, ta ƙara da cewa, shi ne cewa waɗannan mutane suna wakiltar muryoyin da suka dace, ba masu sukar gefe masu tsattsauran ra'ayi da ake zarginsu da zama ba.
"A gare ni, waɗannan ba wurare ba ne na ainihin tunanin hagu. Su mutanen Democrat ne da babban D waɗanda, eh, suna ba'a da dama. Amma su attajirai ne fararen fata da ake yanke wa magana mai tsaka tsaki da laushi. Don haka idan ana tantance wannan, wannan babbar matsala ce."
A cikin 'yan shekarun nan, Einbinder ta gina suna a matsayin ɗaya daga cikin fitattun 'yan wasan Hollywood masu faɗa. Ta yi amfani da jawabai na kyaututtuka da kafofin sada zumunta don yin magana game da rikicin yanayi, shige da fice, ICE, da yaƙin Gaza. A bikin Emmy a watan Satumba na bara, bayan ta ci kyautar mafi kyawun 'yar wasa mai tallafawa a cikin jerin barkwanci don Hacks, ta rufe jawabinta na karɓar kyautar da layin da ya zama ɗaya daga cikin abubuwan da aka fi magana a daren: "Go Birds, fuck ICE, da free Palestine!"
Ta danganta wannan amincewa da lokacin kwaleji, lokacin da yakin neman zaɓe na Bernie Sanders ya zama "farkawa ta siyasa." Babban ɓangare mai wuya na tafiyarta ta siyasa, in ji ta, shine "kawar da" Zionism da aka rene ta da shi. "Da zarar na fahimci gaskiya yadda take da gaske, ba zan iya jure tunanin rashin yin magana ba, a kowane lokaci da kowane wuri, game da yadda take kuskure da tashin hankali. Yadda take wulakanta mutanenmu da abin da addininmu ke nufi."
Rikicin jin kai a Gaza "yana addabar ta," ta ƙara da cewa. "Ina yin abin da na yi imani da shi, a gaskiya, abu ne na Yahudawa—don daraja rayuwar ɗan adam da ƙoƙarin taimaka wa duniya ta warke."
Ta ci gaba: "Ina da gata sosai, domin zargin zama anti-Semite ba ya manne mini. Ni Bayahude ne mai girman kai. Amma na tabbata akwai membobin al'umma da suka ƙi ni saboda wannan, da yawa daga cikinsu a masana'antar mu, kuma ba za su yi aiki da ni ba kuma ba sa son wani abu da ni."
Maimakon jin fushi, ta ce tana jin baƙin ciki da asara. "Ina jin baƙin ciki a gare su. Suna cikin kurkukun akida wanda ke hana su ganin mutuntakar wasu. Suna cikin kurkuku saboda babban yaƙin farfaganda da aka yi musu tun lokacin da suka fara fahimtar harshe." Ra'ayoyinta sun kuma ci wa dangantakar iyali. "Ban san ko za a taɓa gyara su ba, amma na sami sabon iyali a cikin al'ummar Yahudawa masu adawa da Zionism."
Ga Einbinder, siyasa ba ta rabu da rayuwar yau da kullum ba. Ita 'yar bisexual ce, tana da ƴan'uwa biyu masu canjin jinsi, kuma tana magana game da ainihi ba a matsayin muhawara mai zurfi ba amma a matsayin abin da ke cikin rayuwar yau da kullum. "Komai abu ne na sirri. Siyasa ita ce mafi girman abu na sirri. Ba tunani ba ne."
Wannan ƙin raba sirri daga jama'a, a hanyarsa, shi ne ya kai ta Camp Miasma tun farko. Wannan ita ce damarta ta farko ta gaske ta fice daga iyalin ƙirƙira da suka tsara ta a kan Hacks kuma ta gano abin da za ta iya yi ba tare da su ba. "Na kasance cikin farin ciki da tsoro," in ji ta. "Na yi tunani: 'Shin, zan iya yin wannan? Zan iya yin wani abu a wajen yanayin aminci da ya rene ni, tare da mutanen da suka san yadda za su tsara ni?'" Kallon ta tana magana, a bayyane yake cewa ta riga ta sami amsarta. Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma za a fitar da shi a Burtaniya a ranar 21 ga Agusta.
