}@media (min-width: 81.25em){.content__main-column--interactive:before{border-left:1px solid #dcdcdc;left:-11px}}.content__main-column--interactive .element-atom{margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0;padding-bottom:12px;padding-top:12px}.content__main-column--interactive p+.element-atom{padding-top:0;padding-bottom:0;margin-top:12px;margin-bottom:12px}.content__main-column--interactive .element-inline{max-width:620px}@media (min-width: 61.25em){figure[data-spacefinder-role=inline].element{max-width:620px}}[data-gu-name=media]:has(figure.loop) figure.loop figcaption:not(.hidden){z-index:6}[data-gu-name=media]:has(figure.loop) figure.loop button[data-link-name*=gu-video-loop]{align-self:flex-end;margin-bottom:40px;margin-right:3px}[data-gu-name=media]:has(figure.loop) figure.loop .controls-container div:has(button[data-testid=unmute-icon]),[data-gu-name=media]:has(figure.loop) figure.loop .controls-container div:has(button[data-testid=mute-icon]){right:0;padding-left:10px}[data-gu-name=media]:has(figure.loop) #caption-button{z-index:100}@media (min-width: 61.25em){[data-gu-name=media]:has(figure.loop) #caption-button{bottom:20px}}@media (min-width: 46.25em){[data-gu-name=media]:has(figure.cinemagraph) .cinemagraph>div{max-height:unset}}[data-gu-name=body] gu-island[name=SelfHostedVideo]{width:100%;max-width:620px;display:block;margin-top:12px;margin-bottom:12px}[data-gu-name=body] gu-island[name=SelfHostedVideo] figure.loop,[data-gu-name=body] gu-island[name=SelfHostedVideo] figure.loop video{width:100%;height:auto;max-width:620px;margin:0 auto}[data-gu-name=body] gu-island[name=SelfHostedVideo]:has(figure.loop.element-video-immersive){max-width:unset;margin:12px 0}[data-gu-name=body] gu-island[name=SelfHostedVideo]:has(figure.loop.element-video-immersive) figure.loop,[data-gu-name=body] gu-island[name=SelfHostedVideo]:has(figure.loop.element-video-immersive) figure.loop video{max-width:unset;margin:0}@media (min-width: 71.25em){[data-gu-name=body] gu-island[name=SelfHostedVideo]:has(figure.loop.element-video-immersive){width:1140px;margin-left:-180px}[data-gu-name=body] gu-island[name=SelfHostedVideo]:has(figure.loop.element-video-immersive) figure figcaption{margin-left:20px}}@media (min-width: 81.25em){[data-gu-name=body] gu-island[name=SelfHostedVideo]:has(figure.loop.element-video-immersive){width:1300px;margin-left:-260px}}#article>article:not(.content--interactive){overflow-x:clip}#article>article:not(.content--interactive)>[data-gu-name=body] .article-body-viewer-selector>p,#article>article:not(.content--interactive)>[data-gu-name=body] .article-body-viewer-selector>h2,#article>article:not(.content--interactive)>[data-gu-name=body] .article-body-viewer-selector>h3,#article>article:not(.content--interactive)>[data-gu-name=body] .article-body-viewer-selector>ul,#article>article:not(.content--interactive)>[data-gu-name=body] .article-body-viewer-selector>ol,#article>article:not(.content--interactive)>[data-gu-name=body] .article-body-viewer-selector>blockquote{max-width:620px}#article>article:not(.content--interactive)>[data-gu-name=body] #maincontent~[data-print-layout=hide]{max-width:620px;grid-template-columns:[centre-column-start] minmax(0,1fr) [centre-column-end]}:root{--dateline: #606060;--headerBorder: #dcdcdc;--captionText: #999;--captionBackground: hsla(0, 0%, 7%, .72);--feature: #c70000;--new-pillar-colour: var(--primary-pillar, var(--feature))}:root:root{--subheading-text: var(--secondary-pillar);--pullquote-text: var(--secondary-pillar);--pullquote-icon: var(--secondary-pillar);--block-quote-text: var(--article-text)}:root:root blockquote{--block-quote-fill: var(--secondary-pillar)}@media (prefers-color-scheme: dark){:root:root:not([data-color-scheme=light]){--subheading-text: var(--darkmode-pillar);--pullquote-text: var(--darkmode-pillar);--pullquote-icon: var(--darkmode-pillar)}:root:root:not([data-color-scheme=light]) blockquote{--block-quote-fill: var(--darkmode-pillar)}}.content__main-column--interactive .element.element-atom, .element.element-atom { padding: 0; }
.content__main-column--interactive .interactive-atom:first-of-type + p:first-of-type,
.content__main-column--interactive .element-atom:first-of-type + p:first-of-type,
.content__main-column--interactive .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + p:first-of-type,
.content__main-column--interactive .element-atom:first-of-type + .sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
.content__main-column--interactive .element-atom:first-of-type + #sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
.content__main-column--interactive .element-atom:first-of-type + .element-atom + p:first-of-type,
.content__main-column--interactive .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + .sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
.content__main-column--interactive .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + #sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
.content__main-column--interactive hr:not(.last-horizontal-rule) + p,
.content__main-column--interactive hr:not(.last-horizontal-rule) + .ad-slot-container + p,
#article-body > div .interactive-atom:first-of-type + p:first-of-type,
#article-body > div .element-atom:first-of-type + p:first-of-type,
#article-body > div .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + p:first-of-type,
#article-body > div .element-atom:first-of-type + .sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
#article-body > div .element-atom:first-of-type + #sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
#article-body > div .element-atom:first-of-type + .element-atom + p:first-of-type,
#article-body > div .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + .sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
#article-body > div .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + #sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
#article-body > div hr:not(.last-horizontal-rule) + p,
#article-body > div hr:not(.last-horizontal-rule) + .ad-slot-container + p,
.content--interactive > div .interactive-atom:first-of-type + p:first-of-type,
.content--interactive > div .element-atom:first-of-type + p:first-of-type,
.content--interactive > div .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + p:first-of-type,
.content--interactive > div .element-atom:first-of-type + .sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
.content--interactive > div .element-atom:first-of-type + #sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
.content--interactive > div .element-atom:first-of-type + .element-atom + p:first-of-type,
.content--interactive > div .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + .sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
.content--interactive > div .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + #sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
.content--interactive > div hr:not(.last-horizontal-rule) + p,
.content--interactive > div hr:not(.last-horizontal-rule) + .ad-slot-container + p,
#comment-body .interactive-atom:first-of-type + p:first-of-type,
#comment-body .element-atom:first-of-type + p:first-of-type,
#comment-body .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + p:first-of-type,
#comment-body .element-atom:first-of-type + .sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
#comment-body .element-atom:first-of-type + #sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
#comment-body .element-atom:first-of-type + .element-atom + p:first-of-type,
#comment-body .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + .sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
#comment-body .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + #sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
#comment-body hr:not(.last-horizontal-rule) + p,
#comment-body hr:not(.last-horizontal-rule) + .ad-slot-container + p,
[data-gu-name=body] .interactive-atom:first-of-type + p:first-of-type,
[data-gu-name=body] .element-atom:first-of-type + p:first-of-type,
[data-gu-name=body] .element-atom:first-of-type + figure:has(gu-island[name=UnsafeEmbedBlockComponent]) + p:first-of-type,
[data-gu-name=body] .element-atom:first-of-type + .sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
[data-gu-name=body] .element-atom:first-of-type + #sign-in-gate + p:first-of-type,
[data-gu-name=body] .element-atom:fiThis CSS targets the first paragraph after various elements (like interactive atoms, element atoms, sign-in gates, or horizontal rules) within specific containers, adding 14px of top padding. It also applies a drop-cap style to the first letter of those paragraphs in interactive article bodies.The provided text is a CSS selector block, not prose, so it cannot be rewritten into fluent natural English without changing its meaning. It defines drop-cap styling and related spacing rules for article body content.The pullquote elements in the comment body, main body, feature body, and article body are limited to a maximum width of 620px. Showcase figure captions in the main content, feature article container, standard article container, and comment article container are set to static positioning with full width and a maximum width of 620px. On screens at least 71.25em wide, these captions switch to absolute positioning with a maximum width of 140px. On screens at least 81.25em wide, the maximum width increases to 220px. Immersive elements are sized to the full viewport width minus any scrollbar width. On screens up to 71.24em wide, immersive elements have a maximum width of 978px, and their captions get 10px of inline padding. Between 30em and 71.24em wide, that caption padding increases to 20px. Between 46.25em and 61.24em wide, immersive elements have a maximum width of 738px. On screens up to 46.24em wide, immersive elements are shifted left by 10px with no right margin. Between 30em and 46.24em wide, the left shift becomes 20px and captions get 20px of inline padding. On screens at least 71.25em wide, showcase figures inside the body are shifted left by 160px. On screens at least 81.25em wide, that shift becomes 240px. In non-interactive articles, the furniture wrapper spans the second-to-last grid column and sits in the first row with a minimum width of zero. On screens at least 61.25em wide, the first child of the meta section inside the furniture wrapper is hidden unless it has the content__meta-container_dcr class. The title section inside the furniture wrapper gets 2px of top padding. On screens at least 71.25em wide, the standfirst section's before pseudo-element is positioned at the left edge. The right column and centre rule that follow the furniture wrapper start in the second grid row. In the body, figure atoms containing the article layout or a portrait atom get zero block margin. The furniture wrapper is relatively positioned. On screens at least 61.25em wide, it becomes a grid with 20px column gaps, no row gaps, and a template defining named areas for title, headline, meta, standfirst, and portrait across multiple columns and rows.The provided text is CSS code, not prose, so there is no complex phrasing to simplify or rewrite into fluent English. If you'd like, I can instead explain what this stylesheet does in plain English.In the 16th-century poem The Faerie Queene, envy is a ghastly figure riding a ravenous wolf, saddened by the good fortune of others and "wondrous glaof their hardship. It's not a flattering picture; better to be grateful for what we have than to dwell on such a bitter and self-destructive feeling, right? Maybe not. "I think that when we don't examine our envy, that's when it leads us astray," says Dr Stacy Kim, social scientist, life coach and author of the new book Envy: Why Wanting What They Have is the Key to Getting What You Want. Kim wrote the book after noticing how envy came up for her coaching clients and reflecting on the role it had played in her own life. The book draws on social science and philosophy research, as well as her personal and professional experience. To Kim, a lifelong envier who says sibling rivalry pushed her to fast-track a PhD in educational policy and leadership, envy tells you "there's something important here." "Envy signals our goals to us," she says, as well as "what is within our reach," since we tend to envy people similar to ourselves more than, say, superstars. View image in fullscreen Illustration: Courtesy of Balance But how do you turn envy from a sulky feeling into a superpower? Kim gave us some points to consider. What kind of envy are you feeling? Envy is "simply wanting something that someone else has," Kim says. "Everyone envies – it's normal." Yet it comes in different forms. In 2009, Dutch researchers explored and formalized the concepts of "malicious" and "benign" envy. Malicious envy happens "when you are so focused on the person that has what you want" that you want to "take them down," like the evil queen who hoped to kill Snow White, Kim explains. Benign envy, however, is more like admiration plus motivation: it helps you "focus on what it is that you want," Kim says, rather than sabotage. Jealousy, meanwhile, is a whole different ball game. It usually involves three parties and the threat of losing a special status or relationship to another person. How would you feel if you had what you envy? Next comes what Kim calls "probably the most important part of the examination": looking past the thing you covet to the "intangible desire" buried deep within. It's often not so much the object you're craving but "the feeling you think you're going to get" when you acquire or achieve it, she says. Kim's envy of people with bigger apartments, for instance, "is really not just about the apartment," but rather a desire for a calm, uncluttered home. Once you've named the deeper desire, you can look for alternative routes to fulfill it. For Kim, that might mean spending "more time decluttering." If you have a goal that is out of reach, be creative; if you feel a pang of envy watching a 20-year-old ballet dancer but you're 42 and have never taken a class, you might be interested in being able to move more confidently in your own body. An adult beginner dance course could help with that. If you envy the young, you can access the feeling of a promising new life experience by getting out of your comfort zone and trying something novel and intimidating, like visiting a new country or pursuing further study. Have you listened to the "SIReNs"? When a pang of envy strikes, Kim's mnemonic tool for processing it is an acronym: SIReN. Here's what it stands for:
Similar target: "You remind yourself: 'Hey, the reason why I'm feeling this envy is because what I want is within my reach,'" she says.
Intangible desire, as mentioned above
Relevant comparison: Identify which specific domain – something you care about or already participate in – is relevant to your desires
Negative emotion: How long does it last? How intense is the message it's sending? This tells us how important the feeling is.
Does the desire truly come from you – or someone else? Humans are "social beings," Kim says, and this means we often mirror what everyone else wants – French academic René Girard called this mimetic desire. As a result, it's easy to fall into the trap of keeping up with the Joneses, says Kim. With envious clients, KI like to use a technique from psychologist Robert Leahy that can help identify your priorities: imagine you are nothing, a perfect void. Then, one by one, add one thing back into your life. The things you reach for first signal what you value most. Note what they are – your body, your family, your work, your possessions, or something else – and the order they arise in. In Kim's experience, the exercise often highlights that "deep connections with people you care about," being of service to others, and meaningful work are what people most need to be happy – not superficial wants like an expensive car or country club membership.
Can you become closer to the person you envy? An individual you envy today might become a mentor, friend or role model tomorrow. If you know the person, Kim says, "ask some questions" about how they achieved their goals – "usually people will want to be helpful." If that feels unsafe or they're a stranger, Kim advises "researching that person." If it's appropriate and you feel comfortable – for instance, they're an artist with a feedback form on their website – you could send them a compliment or thank you note for the work they've done that has affected you without "asking anything in return." This might feel odd to you, and that's understandable. In Korea, Kim says, the word 부럽다 (buleobda) essentially means "I envy you," and is "an acceptable phrase to use" as an everyday conversation starter. But in the US, admitting to envy might feel exposing and odd, even if honest vulnerability could spark a connection between you and another person. Try "I admire you" or "I'm really curious about how you did that," instead.
Have you tried to focus on your peers instead of those 'in front'? Envy can come from focusing on people you perceive as being ahead of you. Kim suggests also checking, "Who's behind me? Or who's next to me?" When a goal feels impossible, whether because of structural inequalities or just bad luck, you can "hook arms" with people in a similar situation, and look for ways to help each other make progress, she says. Alternatively, offering to collaborate with, share information with or be a mentor to people who may, in fact, admire and envy you can not only boost your self-esteem, but also build useful connections and earn you the respect of your peers. When those around you succeed, "you can own some of that success too," says Kim. A zero-sum game mentality or scarcity mindset isn't typically as satisfying or useful for overcoming challenges, she notes. Solidarity can be much better.
Becoming more aware of envy doesn't mean the complicated feeling won't affect you. It may always be unsettling to feel envious of another person, and even to realize you're an object of envy to others; as Kim says from experience: "Just because you study envy doesn't mean that it goes away." And yet, to an extent, envy is normal and unavoidable. Recognizing why it shows up and how it can be harnessed for good can be a valuable skill.
Envy: Why Wanting What They Have is the Key to Getting What You Want by Stacy S Kim is out now via Balance
Frequently Asked Questions
FAQs Sin or Virtue How Envy Can Actually Be Useful
1 What is envy exactly
Envy is the feeling of discomfort or resentment you get when you notice someone has something you wantlike success looks money or talent Its different from jealousy which is about fearing youll lose something you already have
2 Is envy a sin or a virtue
Neither on its own Envy is just an emotion What matters is what you do with it It becomes destructive when it turns into resentment or spite and it can be useful when it pushes you to improve
3 Is all envy bad
No Psychologists often split it into two types malicious envy and benign envy Only the malicious kind is truly harmful
4 Can envy ever really be useful
Yes Benign envy works like a signalit shows you what you value and want Used well it can motivate you to work harder learn new skills or set clearer goals
5 How do I tell if my envy is the useful kind or the harmful kind
Ask yourself does this feeling make me want to improve or to attack If youre inspired to work on yourself its benign If youre hoping the other person fails its turning toxic
6 What are some reallife examples of useful envy
Seeing a coworker get promoted and using that as motivation to ask for more responsibility Feeling a pang when a friend runs a marathon and signing up for your own training plan Noticing a classmates good grades and changing your study habits
7 Whats the difference between envy and admiration
Admiration is warm and purely positiveyou appreciate someones success without any sting Envy has an edge of I wish that were me Envy can actually be a stepping stone toward admiration once you start working on your own goals
8 Why do we feel envy in the first place
Its a natural social emotion It helps us compare ourselves to others and figure out our place and potential In small doses its part of how humans learn whats worth striving for
9 When does envy become a problem
When it
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